Last night Mr. Philately told me that I have inappropriate fantasies. He said they were mean. He's never told me that before. He certainly didn't say it when I declined to book a cheap room with two single beds for our upcoming London trip. He's just mad about the particular fantasy that came true.

THERE WAS A LINE FOR THE MEN'S ROOM AND NO LINE FOR THE LADIES' ROOM. Go ahead. Read that line again. I know I'm shouting but I can't seem to speak those words without shouting and dancing for joy. I know you don't believe me but I'm telling the truth. I would have taken a picture if I'd had a camera with me (and wouldn't those men have loved that?) I walked right past the men's room line at the gas station and waltzed into the ladies' room. I could not believe it---and I told Mr. Philately that it was a fantasy come true.

But he's a guy. I can't expect him to understand. He hasn't spent his whole life rushing out the second intermission begins so that maybe, just maybe, he can be back in time to see at least part of the second act. He hasn't spent time while pregnant, waiting in a huge line with his legs crossed so he won't embarrass himself. For that matter, he hasn't spent time while not pregnant, waiting in a huge line with his legs crossed so he won't embarrass himself. Actually, the more that I think about it, he does understand a little bit. Otherwise, he wouldn't think it was mean.

Still, who is he to think that he can shame me about my fantasy or try to rob me of my joy? Most of the world thinks I married a sensitive man and I usually agree but I now know where he really stands on the potty issue---and it isn't in a line for the men's room. He probably only pretended to go along with the notion that the Potty 8 were unjustly accused. (The Potty 8 were eight women who were charged with disorderly conduct for commandeering an unused men's room at a baseball game at the old County Stadium. Several female lawyers volunteered their services for the defense. As I recall, the charges eventually were dropped.) I certainly didn't see him volunteering to come to their defense.

My fantasy comes true and all he can think to tell me is that my fantasies are mean and inappropriate. Well, perhaps this fantasy will be the last fantasy I share with him. We'll see how he likes that.

Hmmmm.....on second thought, I might be cutting off my nose to spite my face. I think I'll continue to share my fantasies, inappropriate or not---although I doubt I will be quite as relieved when they come true.

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