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2001-08-10 - 10:44 a.m.

ABSCONDING

The word �absconding� just rolls off the tongue. It has that lovely s sound followed by that nice round vowel. As something that feels good in the mouth, it doesn�t quite match tintinnabulation but it�s a satisfying word nonetheless.

And then there�s the meaning: running out on legal responsibilities. Some of my clients abscond. In a broader sense, Day-Hay occasionally takes her bicycle and absconds for a few hours, Kat somehow occasionally absconds mentally in the middle of a room, and some of my inlaws abscond by disappearing for periods of time. I�m not usually the absconding type but I�m dreaming of absconding too. I just put the final pieces of the plan together for a trip to London in September. I booked the hotel (and got a very good deal too.)

Being very responsible, I don�t abscond well. I don�t just run away and leave messes behind. I can�t abscond on a whim or without planning. It�s just not in me. My parents are coming to watch the girls, I have forms so that the girls can receive medical treatment in my absence, and I will be alerting the schools that Grandma and Grandpa are in charge. Still, I�m running away with my love for over a week to a place neither of us have ever been. (Actually, it�s ridiculously easy to find places we�ve never been. We aren�t exactly world travelers. The only other country we�ve been to is Canada and we�ve only seen parts of that: Windsor, Montreal, Grand Manan, St. John.)

Because I�m going with my love, perhaps I�m eloping instead of absconding. Eloping is a legal term of art used here in Wisconsin. It means that a person who is under a mental health commitment order but in the community has just up and left the state without permission. I�ve never been under a mental health commitment order but there are moments when the possibility does not seem far-fetched. Certainly I�m running away and leaving the state.

Eloping feels almost as good as absconding does in the mouth. It does not have an s sound in the middle but it has that lovely long o. Besides, eloping sounds so much more romantic than absconding and I did make sure that I did not book the hotel that only had twin bends. If I�m eloping, I�m not so much leaving responsibilities as irrationally seeking something better elsewhere. Usually, like Dorothy, I�ve learned that there is no place like home but every life needs moments of exception. This moment will be mine (and his) and I�m seizing it�not as Kat�s brain occasionally seizes but more like Day-Hay�s grabs onto an idea and just won�t let go.

So, I�m eloping with my love in September even though we are already happily married. I can�t wait.

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