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2003-01-12 - 9:18 p.m.
The latest boy is history. Something about his hitting on one of Kat�s close friends soured the relationship. Something about his making out with another of her friends completely turned her off. Something about finding out about both incidents within the space of just a few minutes caused her to march into where he was and dump him immediately. Kat�s self-respect wouldn�t allow her to keep him around for a minute longer than it took to dump him. She�s not happy but she�s philosophical. I did what any mother would do in a situation like this. I asked her father if he still had a stash of chocolate somewhere. (I don�t keep such stashes because I can�t keep such stashes.) He came up with an old, but still edible, peppermint patty, one of her favorite candies. What a good dad! Last night was for backrubs, tears, and chocolate. Today was for dealing with the aftermath. Today was for feeling grateful to the good friend who turned the guy down and immediately took the risk of telling Kat, a child who sometimes believes in shooting the messenger who bears bad tidings. Today was a day for confronting the friend who didn�t tell and who claims that she couldn�t stop the making out. Today was a day for going to religious school earlier to do some girl-bonding, something Kat rarely does. The real question right now is what tomorrow is for. Kat says it is for getting back in the swing of things. Clearly, it is not for getting the forms to allow the ex to come to the Sadie Hawkins dance. But it might be a day for buying a ticket to that dance. It might be a day for recruiting friends to go with. Kat wouldn�t let a little thing like an ex-boyfriend prevent her from having fun and I�m proud of her for that. Some pains a parent cannot protect her child from. Part of learning about relationships is learning that not every boy is trustworthy and that the appearance of sweetness and sweetness itself are two different things. Part of learning about relationships is learning what you can tolerate and what you can�t tolerate. Part of it is learning how to take someone�s measure and recognizing that really knowing a person can take a bit. This learning cannot happen in a pain-free environment. And I want her to learn because the rewards of good relationships are so very many. But the times of tears and chocolates are hard. So we�re down today�down in the dumps. LAST FIVE ENTRIES: Blame It On...  |
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