UNDER THE MICROSCOPE

NEW SPECIMENS OLD SPECIMENS THE SCIENTIST MY LOG CONTACT ME
2002-11-13 - 10:08 p.m.

NOT A TRAGEDY

Poor Kat! She worked and worked and worked with Mr. Philately on her geometry this weekend and she still bombed the test. She is not used to struggling with schoolwork and she is not used to bombing tests she has studied for. She arrived home a few minutes before me and she looked miserable. What she was most miserable about was her fear of our reactions. She was most afraid of Mr. Philately�s reaction.

She almost panicked when I picked up the phone and called him. I had to be very stern to get her on the phone but I knew that she�d feel better after she talked to him. I knew what his reaction would be but she didn�t. I knew that he would feel badly for her but that he wouldn�t be angry at all. He knew she worked hard. He knew it better than me. After all, he worked side by side with her. He also told me earlier that he suspects that she will be working hard for a C or so all year (although this grade was worse.) While she�s mathematical, she�s just not very visual and geometry requires the ability to visualize.

When she expressed her surprise at our lack of anger, I suggested that she really look at our jobs. Our jobs? She couldn�t figure out how our jobs were relevant. She knows that we do much the same thing. She knows that changing the outcomes of court cases, particularly when those outcomes are convictions, is rare. She apparently didn�t realize before that we work jobs where we work very, very hard day in and day out and usually fail in what we set out to accomplish. She never took what she knew and figured out that doing the jobs we do requires a pride in process rather than final goal. We value work and trying hard. The wins in life are nice but living life well is what happens in between those wins.

Kat probably doesn�t want to hear it but, although I feel sympathy for her, I am not sorry that she is struggling. I would rather send her off to college knowing that she can try very hard, fail, and still go on. I would rather she learn that now when I can offer support than have to learn it when she is on her own. I want resiliency for her, not perfection from her. I want to know that she is tough enough to take what life hands her, dig in, and survive.

Blowing a math test is hard on a high achiever but it�s not a tragedy�and I want Kat to know that fact.

LAST YEAR: None of the Above

LAST FIVE ENTRIES:

Watching Out for Missions
Making Kool-aid
What Parents Think
Not Keeping Up With the Cohens
Fighting Over Money

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