At work, swearing is all around me. I had to teach the spellchecker at work not to object to common swear words, including the twelve-letter obscenity. (Yes, I see you counting on your fingers. Hint: It�s not nice to talk about people�s mothers.) Many of the attorneys swear. Many public defenders are not the three-piece suit, button-down type that corporate lawyers are and do not pretend to be. Mr. Philately has been known to let loose with a few choice words from time to time and we have repeatedly told Kat to save that language for when she is �one of the guys.� But I rarely swear.

It�s not that I never swear. Swear words are a part of the language and have been for, well, probably as long as there has been language. They have their uses. Once, when I was a law clerk and told that I could not do something involving labor law and the truck drivers, I borrowed a page out of Millicent Fenwick�s* book and told the supervising attorney that I did not know what the F he was talking about. Only I did not say F. I said the whole word and I did it without flinching. Nothing less would make my point.

It�s just that I usually swear so badly---and it�s my mother�s fault. (That�s right. I�m jumping on the blame-your-mother bandwagon. I can do it because my mother is off having a grand time in Vancouver although I�m sure she will catch up with me later and I�m already looking for a good hiding place.) I say a mild oath and everyone, even though who swear with every other word, tend to look at me strangely.

And yet, my mother never said that we could not swear. She just urged us to consider time, place, and reason. Actually, it�s what she did that makes it hard for me to swear. I do not remember if she did it all the time or just once or twice but it still sounds in my ears. As I swear, I hear her. �Was that extreme provocation?� goes one part of my brain as the word or words escape. If it wasn�t, I feel silly. If it was, I still feel silly. I lack that satisfaction or release that swearing seems to give many people.

And so, when confronted with what I consider pointless swearing, I often wish to ask the same question. Today I will.

Mr. Cheney, whose snare drum of decency appears now to be only a maraca, was that extreme provocation?

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*Millicent Fenwick was a congresswoman from New Jersey and the model for Gary Trudeau�s Lacey Davenport. She used the same tactic when �the guys� tried to bar her from a meeting of New Jersey Democrats on the same grounds. Her repartee was deadly. As the New York Times reported in her obituary:

In a debate over equal rights for women, she once recalled, a male legislator said: "I just don't like this amendment. I've always thought of women as kissable, cuddly, and smelling good." Her reply was classic Fenwick: "That's the way I feel about men, too. I only hope for your sake that you haven't been disappointed as often as I have."

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