2002-11-15 - 10:19 p.m.
This entry is today’s entry. I posted yesterday’s entry this morning.
SECRETS
Keeping other people’s secrets is hard but if it’s not mine to tell, I don’t tell. Keeping my own secrets is almost impossible. What’s the point of my own secret if no one knows I have one? Perhaps that’s why I can have an online journal.
Even if it’s not why I have an online journal, it may be why I was more relieved than angry when Day-Hay came downstairs this afternoon. Yes, what I was doing was shameful. Yes, it involved a four-letter word. Yes, I knew it was bad but I just couldn’t stop myself.
Day-Hay saw me and didn’t say a word about it. She just turned away and went on searching for a paintbrush in the junk of the basement. But she knew and I knew she knew. I was caught. I was busted.
No, I wasn’t eating chocolate right before dinner. Ever since I lost the excess weight this summer, I make sure that I eat what chocolate I eat right out in the open. Chocolate eaten in the open has as many calories as chocolate eaten in secret but I eat less of it in the open. Besides, if someone comes and wants to share it, I now figure that sharing is good.
I was....well.....I was (quick, someone get Bev and Mary some smelling salts)...I was using an IRON. I wasn’t sewing. Ironing during sewing doesn’t count. I was ironing a blouse. I wasn’t ironing it because I had handled it wrong in the wash. That’s bad but not as bad as what I was doing. I was ironing because my weight loss made me so giddy that I went and bought a lovely silk blouse. I can either dry clean it or wash and iron it. I’m too cheap to dry clean it so.....
Oh, forget the excuses. I know they are no good. I know a person can justify just about anything to herself if given enough time. I can look at some of my clients and figure that out. I was ironing and, if it didn’t feel good, it at least felt okay. I was ironing and I didn’t hate it. Oh, the shame!
Still, admitting a problem is the first step to solving it—or so current psychobabble would have you believe. Just in case the touchy-feelies are correct, I’m glad my secret is out so I can face it. Perhaps I should shout it to the world so I can see the error of my ways and reform.
I’m Plankton and today I ironed an entire blouse voluntarily.
There, it’s out and I feel better already.
LAST YEAR: Vacation Days
LAST FIVE ENTRIES:
The Art of the Possible
Not a Tragedy
Watching Out for Missions
Making Kool-aid
What Parents Think
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Copyright 2006 by Ellen |
