We live in an era where we are continually told our standards are too low. We are told our high school students are not well-educated enough. We are told our morals are not sufficient. We are told that our parenting skills are not developed enough. I hear all of this rot and I laugh. Just to be contrary, I�ve decided that my problem is not that my standards are too low.

I�ve decided my standards are too high. Now it�s time to take action. If you hear a loud clunk, you�ll know I�ve gone through with it. That clunk will be my standards falling a notch or two down. I seriously considered leaving them where they were and doing the limbo under them but that action seemed dishonest. I WANT people to know that they are lower. Heck, I�ll fly flags off the bar in hopes of encouraging some others I know to do the same.

I�m going to start with parenting. I�ve spent a lot of time on Kat and the impending prom. I�ve made the perfect dress because that�s what mothers are supposed to do. How do I know? Well, my mother would have done the same. I spent some time earlier this week finding a necklace to go with the dress. That�s what mothers are supposed to do. How do I know? Well, my mother might have done the same. I spent time tonight helping her wash and dry her hair and I�ll spend an hour or so tomorrow helping her curl her hair because that�s what mothers are supposed to do. How do I know? Well, I always wanted my mother to do that for me, even though her hair knowledge ended at washing, drying, and combing. I�ll help her with her makeup because her fine motor control is not equal to her visions because that�s what mothers are supposed to do. How do I know? Well, I always wanted a mother who could do that for me. (My own mother�s makeup knowledge stops at red lipstick.)

Then there are other parenting things. I spend a lot of time suggesting books, re-reading books, and discussing books with my children. That�s what parents who care about education are supposed to do. How do I know? Well, my dad used to do the same for me. I act as technical advisor on science fair projects because that�s what parents are supposed to do. How do I know? Well, I remember a science project with a light bulb and a switch on which my dad acted as technical advisor for me. I carve pumpkins to specifications. That�s what parents are supposed to do. How do I know? Well, my dad carved pumpkins for us and he at least consulted us on how the face should go although he often either did his own thing or deviated to fix a mistake. (I was never sure which.)

I lead a girl scout troop for a good parent should be involved with a child�s activities. That�s what parents are supposed to do. How do I know? Well, my dad went to an organizational meeting for a cub scout troop for my brother and he came back a den father (or, a male den mother as his handbook was for women). I�m on the school board because good parent tangles with those who oversee his children�s education. That�s what a good parent is supposed to do. How do I know? Well, both parents regularly attended school board meetings and my dad regularly spoke out at them.

Somewhere today, in the chaos that I call my life, I heard a small voice. �You�ve set yourself up for failure,� it said. �You cannot be both the wonderful mother you had and then some. You cannot be the terrific dad you had and then some. You cannot be both your wonderful mom and your terrific dad. You need to say, �Enough!��

So I looked closely at the bar I�ve set and I�ve decided to lower it�as soon as I find a ladder high enough to reach it.

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