UNDER THE MICROSCOPE

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10/24/2005 - 9:20 p.m.

CHOICES

Sometimes the very act of deciding that there are choices if you are bold enough to make them is very liberating. While I basically like my boss, I have been finding working in the shadow of her unremitting depression and hatred of her job increasingly draining. Worse, it is contagious. She doesn't want to be there and, slowly, her depression and irritation is infecting each and every employee in the office. Several tend to depression anyway and really don't need additional encouragement in that direction. More and more often, I find myself leaving work and thinking, "I don't want to be here anymore."

Years ago, before FogieKnight started his own business, I used to handle such situations by telling myself, "If it's still this bad tomorrow, I'll quit." Then, he went out on his own. Having his own business has been wonderful for him and the business is doing very well. But the business does not supply health insurance. Now, I'm carrying the health insurance. I cannot just quit. We need my job. I could say I could just quit but it would not be true. I know it and so the old phrase is not as comforting as it was before.

But health insurance is not the only thing tying me to my job. I am a part-time worker with a very interesting job�most of the time. Most days, I wait for the bus with Day, go to work, and then I'm home when she is ready to come home. True, I occasionally take work home with me. But I can work and I can fulfill my home obligations. That's not something you walk away from lightly, especially if you would also need to find a new job with health insurance.

Recently, however, it occurred to me that the need for flexible hours is now time-limited. Day graduates in two years. Once she is out of the house, I no longer need to work part-time. Not working part-time would open other options. And I have begun to take steps to expand my network. I have begun to position myself so that, if I still want to make a move, I can.

Once again, if I'm patient, I likely have reasonable choices. I'm free�or at least I will be.

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