2002-12-06 - 1:39 p.m.
For some background to this piece, see Along for the Ride, which comes before this one.
PRIORITIES
Kat and her rigid thinking were the why. Without Kat, I�m not sure I would have developed the system. Having a child who requires explicit teaching about items not generally explicitly taught can be intellectually challenging. How do you develop enough flexibility within a child to be able to react in those times when rules conflict? I eventually came up with an answer to that question and that answer dictates that I oppose unthinking application of rules, including zero tolerance policies, wherever they occur.
The system that we came up with involved high moral rules, safety rules, and �rules of the house.� It was a hierachy. Rules of the house can be broken for the sake of a safety rule. Safety rules can be broken for the sake of high moral rules. Yes, I was taking the risk of encouraging a sometimes defiant child to break rules. Yet I cannot recall a single time when she justified her actions under this system that I did not believe she was either right or very close to it.
Of course, I didn�t just explain the hierarchy. For years, during car rides, we played �what if...� What if your mother was badly hurt but your homework wasn�t done? Answer: I would call 911 even though I am not supposed to use the phone until my homework is done. What if the teacher had just said, �No talking during this test for any reason,� and you suddenly had to throw up? Answer: I would raise my hand and, if she ignored me, I would go over and tell her anyway.
The system came to mind when I read the paper yesterday. At Madison East High School, a group of girls followed a classmate into a gym locker room and beat her to the floor and kicker her until another student discovered them. This second student stopped it but in the process the group turned on her, breaking her nose and choking her. The story was bad enough but what bothered me even more was the reason that no adult aid arrived. Although students told the gym teacher what was going on and that she needed to come right away, �the national anthem was on, and you can�t really move when the national anthem is on.�
Now, I believe in respect for the national anthem but life and limb are a higher value. You can�t tell me that all an enemy would need to do at time of war is play our national anthem at our soldiers and then they all would stop because �you can�t really move when the national anthem is on.� Similarly, only rules-are-rules would value respect during the national anthem over protecting students from mob behavior.
But when rules are rules, thinking is not allowed. When thinking is not allowed, we�re all in jeopardy. Following rules and not protecting the things the rules are meant to protect become the priorities. And I have zero tolerance for that.
LAST YEAR: In and Out
LAST FIVE ENTRIES:
Along for the Ride
Junkyard
Slip Sliding Away
Just Another Manic Monday
The Limits of Might and Power
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Copyright 2006 by Ellen |
