09/07/2006 - 4:51 p.m.


One of my co-workers is getting married this month. She's worried about whether she's being "Bridezilla." She should stop worrying. She doesn't have the Bridezilla thing in her. Being Bridezilla takes a bit of a flair for drama. It takes a personality that stands up for itself strongly. It takes a little bit (or more) of freely expressed aggression. Most of all, it takes someone whose whole approach to life cannot be summed up in the phrase "If it's not too much trouble, may I…..?"

She thinks she may be Bridezilla because she cried at her fiancé and future mother-in-law. I tried to tell her that the issue is not whether she is upset but whether her upset is in some reasonable proportion to the provocation. If she were Bridezilla, she would have had the fit over the veil that the dog ate. (I've heard of dogs eating homework but veils?) She didn't.

As for her current situation, the truth is that I'd have been more upset than her. This one could require that the whole wedding be postponed—and it's about the legal paperwork. This is about what happens when a fiancé, despite knowing that the clerk's office will require a certified copy of a birth certificate checks but doesn't notice that the copy that he has says "Souvenir copy" across the top.

One of the reasons I had trouble convincing her that she was not over-reacting was because I began coming up with creative solutions. The church will not do a "mock ceremony" and then allow a real one once the paperwork is straightened out so that was out. The next approach was to think of creative ideas to get a birth certificate long-distance from a state with tight controls in less than the several weeks the state likes to handle the whole transaction by mail. I suggested the possibility of appealing to law school classmates in that "foreign" state to act as the fiancé's attorney and send a paralegal or someone to get the important paper on the client's behalf. The only reason I was not having fits myself was because it was not helpful. I was trying to be helpful. She had enough troubles without me.

Luckily, her mother-in-law may have found a copy official enough to work. It has a seal but it is not a raised seal. Let's pray that my co-worker does not get the window of the clerk with the "raised seal" obsession.

So, is she an un unhappy bride? Perhaps. Is she Bridezilla? Not a chance—and I hope she gets to be a beautiful bride right on schedule.

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